Dying Day
by nirvana heart
Summary: Love alone wasn't going to save David, but it might have kept him alive long enough for Star to tell him everything. He's dying, and Star doesn't want to let him go.


Tired.

David was so tired. This was a different kind of tired. He was about to sleep forever, the pain was just too much - he could see the awful antlers from that goddamn deer sticking out of his chest and he wanted to vomit, was that really his body, his blood? - and it ripped him apart quite literally, compressing everything into a throbbing ache. Whenever David slept, his dreams were always hazy and half-forgotten by the time he woke up, but this was much, much more vivid than that. Floating somewhere between life and death. He felt a warmness overcome him, the nausea in his stomach simmering away and the pain slowly, slowly dying. David was quite happy here. He couldn't see this heaven. He could only feel it. It was peaceful, and he hoped that those fucking antlers would go away with time. Or maybe he would just die and he wouldn't be able to feel them, see what was left of the house, his eyes were half-shut and he just wanted to close them and end it all.

_(daaaavid)_

_leave me alone_

_(you have to stay with them, daaaavid)_

_it hurts it hurts_

_(live for your brothers david AVENGE them david AVENGE them david)_

_stop it stop it who are you_

_(dont fall asleep something is worth living for if you fall asleep you will fucking DIE do you want to DIE david do you want to DIE)_

Another sound and another feeling. Max had held his face with one hand earlier on, he knew it was Max, he could tell by the hand. This was another one. The hand was soft and delicate...and so warm and so _alive._ Alive alive-oh, David tried to touch that hand with his own but in his half-dormant mind he knew he couldn't move. He knew the feeling, but his mind was so occupied with the concept of death that he couldn't pinpoint it and he was so _tired_ and-

"David!"

He felt his heaven encompass him fully, and he finally realised who was touching him, trying desperately to keep him awake. They weren't trying to keep him alive so he could remain in pain. His limbs were numb and he was screaming out with every cell, every pore, _everything_ in him (_help me help me please help me) _and he tried to speak to her but he just couldn't. He knew it was Star, he knew what her touch felt like and she was so alive while he was hovering between life and death itself. His tongue lolled around in his mouth like a dead weight, his teeth and lips soaked with his own blood. Why was he still alive? _How_ was he still alive? He was sure the antlers had pierced his heart, ultimately fatal for anyone, vampire included. Looking at them was so disgusting. He wished he could have been sick but then he would have choked and _oh god oh god-_

David was panicking now, something pricking behind his eyes and he knew he was going to start crying. He almost wanted to start thinking about how he, David The All-Powerful, had been reduced to a sobbing mess of blood and death and Star holding his face, touching him, trying to bring him back,that was what the voice in his head had been talking about. _Live for your brothers._ _Don't fall asleep. Something is worth living for. If you fall asleep you will fucking DIE._ David didn't want to die.

He pushed himself to clear his vision, open up his ears and his mind, and ignore the agony in his chest so he could be aware of the world still around him. The house was crumbling thanks to their handiwork, but David really didn't care. He could see Michael, standing in the corner, his eyes back to their original colour and his teeth were no longer fangs. The expression on Michael's face was something that David couldn't even fathom. Either he didn't know the word, or there was nothing that could give justice to it. He didn't look glad David was in that position, but he didn't look like he was about to burst into tears about it. Horrified seemed to be the only word that could begin to convey it, but it really wasn't what David wanted to say. For now, he just focused on Star.

He looked at her, tried as hard as he could to keep his eyes open - if David was going to die, he wanted Star to be the last person he ever saw.

* * *

Star kept her hand on his face while she desperately tried to think up how she could save him. She didn't know how long the night had gone on for; she only knew that David was dying and when his breathing quieted, she began panicking and trying to move him - resulting in a loud whine, something rather uncharacteristic of him. She fell into a cycle of sobbing, gasping, crying his name, clutching his hands as if she could somehow remove the antlers and fix him up from utter willpower and determination. Before he began fighting with Michael, David had wanted to talk to her. She remembered how he'd said it. Full of care and concern.

What had he wanted to tell her? Star was leaning towards the option that he would simply tell her to get out of the house while she still could. But the dominant half of her mind - the one in love with him, naturally - told her romantic tales of David whispering that he loved her, kissing her, holding her, running his tapered fingers through her curly locks; and she would have responded equally. She cherished him like no other. She wanted to drop from all this mental pain - and then realised how much physical pain David was in, and cursed herself for it.

David was going to die. The only man she ever wanted to be with, forever, was dying right in front of her and Star wasn't doing anything about it. The man who had taken her in, the only man she wanted to stay with, forever - and she _could_ have, if she ever let David turn her. David wasn't like the other boys. Although he did have an air of a leader about him, he was always worried for the others and did things because he wanted to, not because everyone else was. She had been his friend, and he had been hers.

_Oh, God,_ she concluded at last, looking upwards and feeling the tears continue to spill out, before looking down and realising that David was looking up at her, crying also. _I love you, David. I love you. _

Star knew that love alone wouldn't save David. But it might have kept him alive, long enough, for her to tell him everything.

* * *

Lucy, Sam, and Michael were outside for whatever reason. David didn't care. He was still alive. Star was still with him. He had to talk to her...but he wasn't sure if he was capable of it.

He began rasping, like he was choking, his mouth was preventing him from talking - full of blood. He really was going to choke if he didn't somehow get rid of it. Star saw it dripping from his lips onto his neck, the awful sounds coming from his mouth were like torture and she quickly grabbed her handkerchief, placing it at David's lips.

"Spit, if you can. You're going to choke."

He didn't think about how surprisingly calm she was - he mustered up his strength and spat into the handkerchief, his mouth now somewhat dry but still full of the metallic taste. He wasn't relishing in it like normal, though. He actually didn't want to taste the blood at all, if he saw any more he was sure he was going to really vomit and then he was sure he would die. But something was stopping him from going...whenever he tried to close his eyes and just _leave..._he couldn't. Like something he needed to desperately do hadn't been done...

"D-David...oh, God, David!" She buried her face into her hands, sobbing loudly and David hated himself.

"I...I had to t-tell you s...something...didn't I...?" he managed to croak out, his already baritone voice about two octaves deeper. Star looked at him, with shimmering, deep brown eyes, nodding slowly. She would have been surprised if he lifted his pinky finger, never mind having an antler through the heart and still being able to speak. He looked sullen, and totally exhausted, like he'd been through every bit of strife and misery in the world. As if he'd starved himself, burnt himself, tore, broke and cut himself to death's door. She felt like it was cruel to keep him alive when he hated just about everything, _real_ hate, cutting him open and staining his organs a solid, congealed black. Star didn't know why he hated. He just did.

"I was..." he stopped to inhale sharply, wheezing weakly, clearly in excruciating pain. Star gulped nervously. "...I was...g-gonna tell...you t-to get...outta here...but that...isn't very im-important now..."

She waited for him to continue, firmly grasping his hand in hers and squeezing tight, gasping with sadness when he did it back. Part of her wanted to scream at him to get on with it.

"Star," he said clearly, caringly, and she finally freely let the tears fall. That voice, David's voice. Deep and darkly sexy but also tender and gentle. He really was sweet when he wasn't with the boys. She could have listened to him forever and she would have but it was too late, he was dying dying dying and Star was living and why wasn't it the other way around? He could have gone on living his life that he loved. Instead of Star living one without him. He wasn't even gone but it was already hell and she wasn't going to be able to bear it. A world with no David was like a world without air. "I...I c-can't believe...I let this h-happen..."

He sighed a little at his own comment, his bottom lip trembling, but his potential tears died away when he began coughing violently. She held onto him tight, kissing his hand as if her touch would cause life to blossom inside of him once again.

"But...I...I-I really...I l-love y-you..."

She _wailed_ then, eyes shut tight and the tears spilling over her cheeks, knowing that David was just staring at her, waiting for the right reaction. What remained of his heart wrenched at her cries, and despised himself for knowing he was the reason she was so upset. She didn't believe it. All the time she had been with the boys, and he was telling her right as he was slipping away from her. But then again that was so typical of David, to hide his feelings from her, and yet it was so typical of him to make the entire thing into some corny fucking movie. She could only weep as she tried to choke out her own response.

"D-David...! Why did y-you wait to tell m-me _now?_ I l-love you, I've _a-always_ loved y-you, oh David I d-don't want to d-do this w-without y-you I c-can't-"

"Kiss me," he asked, in an official sort of voice, trying so hard to admit he wasn't in pain but it was obvious. Star blinked at him, but knew she had no time to waste. She had always wanted to kiss David - who _wouldn't_ want to kiss David, even boys threw themselves at him - but now that she was actually in the situation, it made her nervous and her stomach knotted up, tightening like a belt, preventing her from breathing.

_David wants me to kiss him so it will be the last thing he remembers...but what if I'm not good enough for him, what if I'm bad at it, it's...Star, shut up, he's dying for Christ's sake just DO IT!_

She shuffled towards him and leant over him, then slowly reached down to meet his lips with her own. And it felt _incredible._ Star wanted to giggle at how inexperienced he was at it, but it didn't even matter ignored the fact that he tasted of his own blood and it left her mouth feeling dry, all that mattered was that she was kissing David she was kissing _David _and it felt so good, so _right..._

He shuddered when her lips left his. "D-Don't...n-no..." She smiled weakly, then pushed herself back against his mouth. He tugged at her curls, feeling what was being given to him, and the beautiful woman responded gently and curiously. Open and wet, warm and comforting. David had never felt anything like this before. Never as willing and as desperate and as full of love as this. He tried not to feel a sense of utter loss when she pulled away again; Star was still there, but the thought he would definitely be dead within a few minutes was eating him up inside. He didn't want to die. He didn't want to die. He...he...

"It h-hurts..." he whined, and she brushed away strands of his hair that had escaped into his face. His watery blue eyes blinked a few times, full of fresh tears. "Everything h-hurts, Star..."

"It's okay," she reassured, though the fact she was never going to be able to kiss him again ripped her heart in two. She knew that David didn't just mean his physical pain, but the own mental torment of his brothers' death; how violently they died, and how easily they had been defeated. Her voice became shaky, but she kept on talking. "It's okay, David...I'm here, I'm here..."

"I don't want t-to go..."

Those five words prompted acceptance into Star. Although she desperately wanted to save him, she knew that really, nothing could be done, and it was going to be a right job getting him off those antlers. But for now, they were sharing a well-deserved moment together. Star closed her eyes, and thought up what she could say. 'It's okay' didn't seem to suffice. What was honestly going to comfort him? No words could ever vanquish David's fear. This was a side of David she'd never seen before - he was terrified to the core, like a lost child just awakening from a nightmare...a lost boy.

Star knew love wasn't enough. Part of her feared that _she_ wasn't enough.

But David's face told her otherwise.

"I...I'm here, David," Star promised, kissing his hand once more, and remaining there for a few long seconds. The blonde wisps of hair she'd brushed away had fallen into his eyes again, as if they were trying to keep his eyes open. But she ran her hand across his forehead, his skin sweaty and hot, and she thumbed his forehead gently, trying to calm him down. "I love you."

David's eyes were closed, his lips trying to formulate words, he looked so hopelessly desperate that Star couldn't believe she was letting him go. Part of her wanted to _murder_ Michael, part of her wanted to thank him, part of her wanted to scream and cry for David...she made sure to comfort herself with the fact that she had made David's last moments something he had always wanted.

Moments later, his eyes fully shut, his head lolled to the side, and nothing in the world mattered anymore.


End file.
